I, Bryarly Bishop, am not perfect.
(Shocking, isn't it?)
I am, in fact, so emphatically imperfect that I have embarked on numerous plans of self-improvement throughout the years. One time I had to break a habit of chewing ice. Another time I made myself put my books down and talk to people. On multiple occasions I've forced myself to join a sports team I didn't think I'd be good at - volleyball, cross country and cricket being a few notable ones.
You'd think that someone with such a long history of tweaking and fiddling with their imperfections would have a method. A plan. Some sort of list, even. Ben Franklin did, after all.
The most recent personal project has been to cut down my sugar consumption. As mentioned over a year ago in my "I'm Addicted" video, I have a serious sweet tooth. In that video I joked about quitting chocolate. Later I wrote a blog post about it. While I wanted to express it in a funny way, I genuinely did give up chocolate for a while. Cold turkey. With strength and dignity!
It was terrible.
Though my personal chocolate ban has now lifted, I've somehow gotten into the habit of having something sweet after lunch AND dinner. Whether it's a cookie, a piece of chocolate, or ice cream, I always end up having something chock full o' sugar. Since I am, in fact, not a total idiot, I knew this wasn't really good for me. And by not really I mean definitely not - so I decided to cut back. Way back. All the way back.
Turns out I didn't trust myself to give up sugar in small steps. I know myself too well for that. If I'd tried to say, "Well, I'll have ice cream once a week," it would quickly have turned into, "Well, I'm sad today, so I'll just cheat a little..." and then, "Well, there's some left over, so I guess I'll just finish that..." and so on and so forth. Self-control? Psh. Like we have that here!
It's been going okay, not having sugar. I have indulged twice, but given that it's been 3-4 weeks I think that's pretty good!
Now that sugar consumption is down, I've been unable to resist picking at myself again. Not physically. Just....as a person.
I haven't been as productive as I would like lately. Lately meaning since graduation. In May.
Leaving my post-graduation existential crises (yep, that's multiple) aside, I tried to find other things that were holding me back. What I've decided is one of the problems is my tendency to start my day not with organization, or with emails, or with a book, but with webcomics and Tumblr.
Tumblr, as you might know, is a black hole of time suck. If you want to have free time, don't go to Tumblr - in fact, if you want any time at all, don't go to Tumblr. It's another one of those things where you can't go just once. You'll go, you'll have a look around your Dashboard, and then you'll come back every 30 minutes to see if something new has cropped up. Or, failing that, you'll start searching your tags - and everyone knows that's a rabbit hole.
I think that beginning the day with 'fun' things or with time-wasters is like playing with a tar baby before you go to your other chores. It seems okay at first, but then you get seriously stuck. It is nigh impossible to wrench yourself away.
In the interest of spending my time on things I actually care about or, at the very least, getting something - anything - done, I've decided to stop reading webcomics. And stop going to Cracked (which I officially stopped doing two years ago, but which I still occasionally visit) AND stop going to Tumblr unless it's after 8pm and I have no work to do.
Harsh? Maybe. But I like myself better when I spend my time on worthwhile things. And much as I love 'em, getting sucked in to stories and cat pictures when I could be making things of my own is just not as fulfilling.
What do you guys want to improve about yourselves, and how do you go about it?
Death Cab for Cutie - I Will Possess Your Heart
Death Cab for Cutie - Marching Bands of Manhattan
Death Cab for Cutie - Crooked Teeth
Death Cab for Cutie - Tiny Vessels