A few days ago I got paid to model for a beauty school. They needed a living, breathing, real-life lady on whom to practice makeup, and I happened to fit the bill. Yay me!
It was six and a half hours of sitting in a chair getting my face pulled, rubbed and painted. That part wasn't bad - when I've agreed to it beforehand, I like having my face touched - and there was music, but what I hadn't factored in was the fact that when people are learning their instructors tell them things. Again, no problem. But it started to be a bit uncomfortable when those instructions weren't based on things like which brush to use, but were instead based on what to do based on the model's features. Or, you know, my features.
At one point the instructor said, "Now, her eyes are actually quite close together, so you can use the brush to highlight the sides of her nose, too."
Hm. Well. That's not fun.
Spending six hours in front of a mirror is bound to have a questionable effect on anyone's self-esteem, but factor in a few comments like that and you begin to look seriously at yourself, going, "Are they too close together? Is my skin too uneven?" I feel pretty comfortable about my face, as a general rule - we've had 22 years together and I'm just used to it at this point - but I'd be lying if I said I felt completely confident in myself.
As a girl whose idea of makeup is a bit of chapstick and a quick swish of mascara (eyeliner only if we're feeling fancy) I felt oddly exposed going out in makeup during the lunch break. You'd think a layer of makeup would make you feel more covered, but instead I felt flashy, uncomfortable, like everyone was staring at me. Going home at the end of the day was even worse, as at that point I had not only a smoky eye but also a bright red lip. It did match my hat, so there's that.
I worried about my looks on the way home - not in a, "Oh, dear, my eyes might be too close together!" kind of way, but in a, "Hm. I wonder what my boyfriend will think of this." My dad really dislikes makeup, so as I was growing up any step in that direction was met with a frown. I know guys have different opinions on makeup - my Dad hates it, my friend Lewis loves it, and my friend Andrew is pretty oblivious to it - but I didn't know how my guy in particular felt. Would I be met with a grimace?
(I wasn't, of course. I was met with surprise and a touch of confusion that relaxed after I took off the lipstick.)
Makeup is really odd. I always used to think that girls who wore a lot of makeup were insecure, but after spending a day around girls who are really, really in to makeup, I began to think that these girls think of it as an accessory. It's fun for them and can almost be seen as a fashion statement. When I wear a lot of makeup, I feel obviously not myself - it's not fun, it's scary.
How do you feel about makeup? Yea or nay?
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